Mary of Bethany
by Jeanne Kun
Reflecting on the Word
She was a simple first-century woman from a negligible village in a country overshadowed by the Roman Empire, yet the memory of Mary of Bethany has endured through two millennia. Her fame is widespread, even though relatively little is known about her life. The evangelists tell nothing of her birth, family background, or social standing. However, the descriptions they so vividly paint of her encounters with Jesus give us a truer picture of her than we would gain from an entry in Who’s Who? In each of the gospel stories about Mary of Bethany, we see her in the same place – at the Lord’s feet.
The Good Portion. Martha and Mary and their brother Lazarus were dear friends of Jesus (John 11:5). Their home was a haven where he found rest and refreshment in its loving atmosphere. During the last days of his life when Jesus taught daily in the Temple, he withdrew at night to Bethany (Matthew 21:17; Mark 11:11) – most probably to the house of Martha, Mary, and Lazarus.
Hospitality is regarded very highly in the culture of the Middle East, so it’s natural that Martha wanted to serve Jesus well. She loved Jesus deeply, and expressed this love concretely by preparing him a fine meal. However, Martha was an anxious, busy hostess, so occupied with cooking that she couldn’t take the time to sit down with her guest. Jesus appreciated Martha’s loving care, but urged her to relax and enjoy his company.
When Martha indignantly asked, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone?” (Luke 10:40), she showed a self-concern that robbed her of the ability to appreciate the precious gift of the moment – fellowship with Jesus. In her complaint we find the same Greek verb, melei, that the disciples used in their accusation of Jesus during the storm at sea: “Do you not care if we perish?” (Mark 4:38). Jesus responded the same way to both upheavals: He calmed the troubled hearts and storms that swept around him. Jesus’ gentle rebuke to Martha – ”You are anxious and troubled about many things” – was meant to help her recognize how senseless and unnecessary her anxieties were. Only one thing is needed (Luke 10:41-42).
Unlike Martha, Mary was wholly present to Jesus, wholly there for him. She stayed near to him, not wasting any of the brief moments he spent in their house. She simply sat still at Jesus’ feet and listened to his conversation. She didn’t want to miss a single word he spoke. She had indeed chosen the “good portion” (Luke 10:42). Mother Basilea Schlink, founder of the Evangelical Sisterhood of Mary, described Mary well:
In Bethany Jesus found open hearts that loved him and eagerly awaited him at all times. Mary laid all else aside; it was of secondary importance to her. When Jesus came, she hastened to him and devoted herself fully to him. She was completely captivated by Jesus. She had eyes and ears for him alone, for him whom her soul loved. To love Jesus, to hear words of eternal life from his lips meant everything to her. (The Holy Places Today)
Mary’s vision was focused on Jesus as she sat at his feet. There, so close to him, she became sensitive to what was on his heart.
We may feel sorry for Martha, left to fix the dinner alone, and resent Mary’s “portion.” But rather than seeing the two postures as mutually exclusive, might we not find in Martha and Mary complementary aspects of the call given to all followers of Christ? Balancing action and contemplation in a creative tension in our own lives, we dynamically express our love for Jesus through both.
The Anointing. Matthew and Mark place the anointing at a dinner held in Bethany in the home of Simon the leper, and the woman is unnamed (Matthew 26:6-7; Mark 14:3). John identifies her as Mary, and makes note of Martha’s and Lazarus’ presence at the meal – perhaps a celebration of Lazarus’ resurrection. The fourth evangelist does not specifically say that the dinner was held in their house, but since he tells us that Martha was serving (again), we can make that assumption (John 12:1-2).
In Jesus’ day, it was customary to honor guests by offering them scented water and washing their feet. Mary carried out this service with special refinement, lavishly anointing Jesus with fragrant nard. Unconcerned about what the other guests might think of her, she cared only for her master and uninhibitedly expressed her love for him.
The ointment Mary used to anoint Jesus was the aromatic essence of spikenard. The hairy stem of this small plant gives off a rich, sweet-smelling fragrance. Oil pressed from spikenard was used to make perfume, so it became an important trade item in the ancient world, transported on camelback from the Himalayan Mountains, where it grew, to merchants in the Mediterranean world. Thus, essence of spikenard was quite expensive – Mary’s perfume was worth three hundred denarii. With a laborer’s pay being a denarius a day at that time, it cost the equivalent of almost a year’s wages. Mary’s offering was indeed a generous one!
Mark adds the detail that the perfume was held in an alabaster jar (Mark 14:3). Alabaster, a fine, white or translucent variety of gypsum or calcite, is used for carving ornamental objects such as vases and flasks. Mary broke the neck of her exquisite vessel to allow the last drop of perfume to flow out. The flask was to serve no one else and no other purpose – Jesus was worthy of everything.
Mary’s deed shows us some beautiful truths: Love never calculates, but wants to give the utmost. Though prudence might caution that this gesture was an extravagant waste, love obeys the promptings of the heart. A gift is truly a gift when it is accompanied by sacrifice.
All the evangelists noted that the apostles were indignant at Mary’s extravagance. While their thought that the poor could have been better served by this money was well-intended (Matthew 26:8-9; Mark 14:4-5; John 12:4-5), their complaint against Mary shows that they missed the point of her symbolic action. Jesus himself interpreted Mary’s “beautiful” deed to them, explaining that the anointing was a preparation for his burial (Matthew 26:10, 12; Mark 14:6, 8). At Jesus’ birth the Magi had presented the gift of myrrh (Matthew 2:11) commonly used when wrapping a body in the burial shroud, which foreshadowed Jesus’ death. Now Jesus attached the same significance to Mary’s deed of anointing him with pure nard.
Mary’s gesture was spontaneous, probably done on the spur of the moment, yet it grew out of a long-practiced attentiveness to Jesus. The apostles had not understood when Jesus spoke directly to them about his impending passion (Luke 18:31-34). But perhaps Mary, with her fine sensitivity, sensed that he was troubled by the trials through which he was soon to pass and thus sought to comfort him with this loving favor.
Little did Mary imagine as she knelt at the feet of Jesus, anointing them and wiping them with her hair, that her action would become famous and her name known for generations to come. Her sole thought was to show the Lord how much she loved him. Treasuring her love, Jesus honored Mary and promised that “wherever this gospel is preached in the whole world, what she has done will be told in memory of her” (Matthew 26:13; Mark 14:9). In the spreading of the story of Mary’s beautiful deed throughout the whole world – prefigured by the spreading of the sweet fragrance of the perfume throughout the house (John 12:3) – Jesus’ prophecy has indeed been richly fulfilled:
Wherever in the world you may go, everyone respectfully listens to the story of her good service. . . . And yet hers was not an extraordinary deed, nor was she a distinguished person, nor was there a large audience, nor was the place one where she could easily be seen. She made no entrance onto a theater stage to perform her service but did her good deed in a private house. Nevertheless . . . today she is more illustrious than any king or queen; no passage of years has buried in oblivion this service she performed. (St. John Chrysostom, Adversus Iudaeos, V, 2)
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The Scene
Luke 10:38-42
10:38 Now as they went on their way, he entered a village; and a woman named Martha received him into her house. 39 And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to his teaching. 40 But Martha was distracted with much serving; and she went to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.” 41 But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things; 42 one thing is needful. Mary has chosen the good portion, which shall not be taken away from her.”
Mary annoints Jesus' feet
The Scene
Mark 14:3-9
14:3 And while he was at Bethany in the house of Simon the leper, as he sat at table, a woman came with an alabaster jar of ointment of pure nard, very costly, and she broke the jar and poured it over his head. 4 But there were some who said to themselves indignantly, “Why was the ointment thus wasted? 5 For this ointment might have been sold for more than three hundred denarii, and given to the poor.” And they reproached her. 6 But Jesus said, “Let her alone; why do you trouble her? She has done a beautiful thing to me. 7 For you always have the poor with you, and whenever you will, you can do good to them; but you will not always have me. 8 She has done what she could; she has anointed my body beforehand for burying. 9 And truly, I say to you, wherever the gospel is preached in the whole world, what she has done will be told in memory of her.”
The Scene
Mark 14:3-9
14:3 And while he was at Bethany in the house of Simon the leper, as he sat at table, a woman came with an alabaster jar of ointment of pure nard, very costly, and she broke the jar and poured it over his head. 4 But there were some who said to themselves indignantly, “Why was the ointment thus wasted? 5 For this ointment might have been sold for more than three hundred denarii, and given to the poor.” And they reproached her. 6 But Jesus said, “Let her alone; why do you trouble her? She has done a beautiful thing to me. 7 For you always have the poor with you, and whenever you will, you can do good to them; but you will not always have me. 8 She has done what she could; she has anointed my body beforehand for burying. 9 And truly, I say to you, wherever the gospel is preached in the whole world, what she has done will be told in memory of her.”
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Daily Reading & Meditation
Tuesday (1/27): "Whoever does the will of God is my brother, and sister, and mother"
Scripture: Mark 3:31-35
31 And his mother and his brothers came; and standing outside they sent to him and called him. 32 And a crowd was sitting about him; and they said to him, "Your mother and your brothers are outside, asking for you." 33 And he replied, "Who are my mother and my brothers?" 34 And looking around on those who sat about him, he said, "Here are my mother and my brothers! 35 Whoever does the will of God is my brother, and sister, and mother."
Meditation: Who do you love and cherish the most? God did not intend for us to be alone, but to be with others. He gives us many opportunities for developing relationships with family, friends, neighbors, and co-workers. Why did Jesus, on this occasion, seem to ignore his own relatives when they pressed to see him? His love and respect for his mother and his relatives was unquestionable. Jesus never lost an opportunity to teach his disciples a spiritual lesson and truth about the kingdom of God. On this occasion when many gathered to hear Jesus he pointed to another higher reality of relationships, namely our relationship with God and with those who belong to God.
What is the essence of being a Christian? It is certainly more than doctrine, precepts, and commandments. It is first and foremost a relationship – a relationship of trust, affection, commitment, loyalty, faithfulness, kindness, thoughtfulness, compassion, mercy, helpfulness, encouragement, support, strength, protection, and so many other qualities that bind people together in mutual love and unity. God offers us the greatest of relationships – union of heart, mind, and spirit with himself, the very author and source of love (1 John 4:8,16). God's love never fails, never forgets, never compromises, never lies, never lets us down nor disappoints us. His love is consistent, unwavering, unconditional, and unstopable. Nothing can deter him from ever leaving us, ignoring us, or treating us unkindly. He will love us no matter what. It is his nature to love. That is why he created us – to be united with him and to share in his love and unity of persons (1 John 3:1). God is a trinity of persons – Father, Son, and Holy Spirit – and a community of love. That is why Jesus challenged his followers and even his own earthly relatives to recognize that God is the true source of all relationships. God wants all of our relationships to be rooted in his love.
Jesus is God's love incarnate – God's love made visible in human flesh (1 John 4:9-10). That is why Jesus describes himself as the good shepherd who lays down his life for his sheep and the shepherd who seeks out the sheep who have strayed and lost their way. God is like the father who yearns for his prodigal son to return home and then throws a great party for his son when he has a change of heart and comes back (Luke 15:11-32). Jesus offered up his life on the cross for our sake, so that we could be forgiven and restored to unity and friendship with God. It is through Jesus that we become the adopted children of God – his own sons and daughters. That is why Jesus told his disciples that they would have many new friends and family relationships in his kingdom. Whoever does the will of God is a friend of God and a member of his family – his sons and daughters who have been ransomed by the precious blood of Christ.
An early Christian martyr once said that "a Christian's only relatives are the saints" – namely those who have been redeemed by the blood of Christ and adopted as sons and daughters of God. Those who have been baptized into Jesus Christ and who live as his disciples enter into a new family, a family of "saints" here on earth and in heaven. Jesus changes the order of relationships and shows that true kinship is not just a matter of flesh and blood. Our adoption as sons and daughters of God transforms all of our relationships and requires a new order of loyalty to God first and to his kingdom of righteousness and peace. Do you want to grow in love and friendship? Allow God's Holy Spirit to transform your heart, mind, and will to enable you to love freely and generously as he loves.
"Heavenly Father, you are the source of all true friendship and love. In all my relationships, may your love be my constant guide for choosing what is good and for rejecting what is contrary to your will."
Psalm 24:7-10
7 Lift up your heads, O gates! and be lifted up, O ancient doors! that the King of glory may come in.
8 Who is the King of glory? The LORD, strong and mighty, the LORD, mighty in battle!
9 Lift up your heads, O gates! and be lifted up, O ancient doors! that the King of glory may come in.
10 Who is this King of glory? The LORD of hosts, he is the King of glory! [Selah]
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(c) 2009 Don SchwagerSphere: Related Content
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