Another great e-mail blast from Father Leo!!!! A Must Read!!!!
We Need More Monica’s!
August 27th is the Feast of St. Monica, the saintly mother who prayed for her son, Augustine, aka St. Augustine. She prayed for her son to turn away from a sinful life and to reconcile his intellect to the wisdom of the Church. Her prayers worked! God, in His time, answered her prayers. And Augustine finally understood why Faith meant so much to his mother. Eventually, Augustine experienced an intellectual conversion and a change of heart. With St. Monica’s inspiration, Augustine became one of the greatest intellectual and theologically inclined saints in the Catholic Church’s history.
Monica is a great example for many families who may feel frustration and even despair that their children may not be practicing their Faith as the parents taught them and want for them. Parents write to me all the time, or stop me at a conference and ask, “what do I do? My children aren’t practicing their faith anymore?” Unfortunately, in these brief emails or meetings, I can’t answer all of the various situations that are posed to me. However, I can suggest a few different ways that parents can preserve and encourage their family’s faith.
First, start young! Children are naturally more receptive to faith when they are raised in it. Teaching the basics in prayer means developing a prayerful foundation. This young set of parents from Nashville is teaching their daughter Mimi to pray Grace Before Meals! Isn’t she like a little “poster child” for Grace Before Meals! They are only doing what they themselves learned from their parents!
Yet, teaching them from the start isn’t a “guarantee” your children will be saints. Therefore, if you did raise your children in faith, but they are no longer practicing or starting to question their faith, make sure you remain open to their questions and try to seek answers to their questions or issues of doubt TOGETHER! Don’t just dismiss them in your frustration. Instead, try to seek the response to their concerns. Keep open the lines of communication and try to grow more confident in your own faith by trusting that God still loves your child more than you can imagine.
Another consideration is to make sure that you as parents are practicing what you preaching. While in Japan, I met several families who are trying to live their faith openly by taking time to pray together as members of an international group called “Couples for Christ.” While in Japan, I had a chance to do a Grace Before Meals Presentation for them.
The formula for this gathering is simple. While the parents come together, share a meal, take time for sharing, offering each other support, singing a few songs and offering some petition prayers. The children join in the prayers for a while but also have some time to play with the other kids. The children see that mom and dad DO pray together and with others – and not just in church. The kids see that mom and dad ARE serious about their faith.
The statement, “I believe faith is a ‘private’ thing” is unfortunately a temptation of the devil. We are tempted to not live our faith outside our home or church. The fact is, if you really have faith, you will not be afraid to share it everywhere! I realize that people are convinced that separation of church and state means that no one should talk about faith outside of church. But the fact is, God’s kingdom is not limited to church walls or my bedroom door! Make sure your children see that you are practicing your faith, and trying to practice what Christ preaches.
Here’s another little tip to help: make sure there is a balance between praying and playing! It would be nice if children and teenagers were naturally inclined to prayer. Although I do know some children who are, it is more likely they are more interested in playing outside or video games. The reality is, we can’t and should not force kids to say “formal prayers” all the time. That would be imbalanced. Remember, families are families. They aren’t mini-monasteries, or mini-convents, or mini-seminaries. Therefore, make sure you and your family has a healthy and balanced “diet” of activities: playing, praying, eating, relaxing, learning, talking, etc., etc.,
If you’re whole life exists around a particular sport or hobby, to the exclusion of other wholesome and inspiring activities, then you may need to take a break from it. Especially if it’s slowly creeping out time for prayer, excluding family meals, and just ‘chilling out’ as a family! The balance of a healthy life requires us to make sure we master our schedules instead of having our schedules master us!
Another suggestion would be for the families to encourage their children to make sure they have good friends. Make sure parents ask their kids questions about what makes a good friend for you? How can your children be good friends for others? Ask, “how do you know if a friend is helping or hurting you?” Children should know how to make these important interpersonal relational distinctions.
When I was in Toronto a few weeks ago, I met several young people as part of the BLD Youth Conference. In the Tagalog Language, BLD stands for “Bukas Loob Sa Diyos” – which translates to “Open Your Heart to the Lord.”
(Make sure you check out the updated picture page on the web to see other fun pics from these and other events!)
It was inspiring to see so many families in Canada and parts of the USA who are part of this growing International Group. Like the Couples for Christ, this group also started in the Philippines, where family ties are strong – but not without the challenges faced by the families in the west. But, these groups, and so many other ecclesial movements provide resources and relationships that can truly help your family grow stronger in communion with each other and God! If you have questions about your family’s faith, do something about it and join a good group of people who, like St. Monica, want their children to be saints too!
To summarize, I know that St. Monica provides for us a living example of what is necessary to preserve your family. Are you “waiting” for your children to grow up before making a decision to raise them in faith? If you are, you are denying them grace now! Are you telling your children to pray, but at the same time not praying yourself, or not letting your own children see you pray? If so, then your children are receiving mixed messages from you! Is there is a balance in your family, or do you just try to “squeeze in” prayers and church? If there is an imbalance, trust that the devil will always push and pull us off the path that requires us to be balanced if we want to ‘walk the talk.’ Finally, are you helping your children to “flock together” with other good kids? Trust me, they ARE out there! Are we helping them to understand healthy distinctions in relationships by making sure we have good relationships ourselves – starting with your spouse?
Ultimately, your children will make their own decisions. You can’t force them to be a saint right here and now! Just ask St. Monica who witnessed her son, Augustine, take baby steps in Faith only when she was ready to die! We have to trust that God is hearing your prayers. This week’s email blast is just one more way that God is trying to remind families of what is most important. This advice didn’t come from me, Fr. Leo. It really came from the witness of the saints, especially Monica, who I humbly ask to pray for all families and all children who do not yet know Your love and call to be saints, now and forever! St. Monica, pray for us!
Cid’s “dribble” of vinaigrette!
The Couples for Christ dinner in Japan, where I shared a Grace Before Meals presentation, gave me an opportunity to share (on an international level), the powerful message of our movement. At the same time, it gave me a chance to share a recipe for tasty vinaigrette that people can make with their children. By allowing one of the participating children, Cid, to help make the salad dressing, he not only learned a skill he can share, he also learned how eating veggies (like salad) taste so good!
When I “tested” him to remember the ingredients of the vinaigrette, he passed with flying colors. Then he proceeded to reiterate a very important point: Don’t drown the lettuce in salad dressing, but instead, simply lightly “dribble” (i.e., drizzle) the dressing over the salad greens! What a great kid, from a great family!
I use this vinaigrette, mixing and matching various ingredients and common sweeteners to inspire diversity in vegetable flavors as well as to wake up the taste of meats. For example, grilling steaks or meat and putting it on top of the fresh and lightly dressed greens inspires a bold taste without being an overly heavy meal! I made a similar meal while me and my friends were on vacation. We wanted a meal with bold flavors, but nothing too heavy that would hinder us from taking advantage of outdoor hiking and biking. Give it a try for your family.
Click here for the recipe.
Prayer for Families
Parents have a great responsibility AND privilege to raise their children in faith. Don’t worry, you are not alone. And, above all, God knows that you are trying to do your best. And, if you’re not doing your best, then God can also give you the courage and strength to do your job better. Go ahead and talk with the one who helped St. Monica get through her difficult years with her son, who eventually became a great saint!
Let us pray: Father in Heaven, we can be so imperfect at times. We can forget the blessings and we so often focus on the bad. In a time when families struggle to stay together, help us to remember that a family that prays together stays together. And Lord, even when some of our family members turn away from You, help us to trust that you will never turn your back on them. Give us grace to strengthen our ties with one another and with You. Give us grace to seek the support and communities to keep our family focused on Your love, Your laws, and Your invitation to be part of Your heavenly family forever. Amen.
Ask Fr. Leo for fatherly advice.Any submissions may be used in future Grace Before Meals publications.
Please forward Fr. Leo’s weekly email blast to anyone you think would benefit. If you haven’tsigned up for the Food for the Body, Food for the Soul weekly email blast, go here to register now. Also visit our blog.
Forward email
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We Need More Monica’s!
August 27th is the Feast of St. Monica, the saintly mother who prayed for her son, Augustine, aka St. Augustine. She prayed for her son to turn away from a sinful life and to reconcile his intellect to the wisdom of the Church. Her prayers worked! God, in His time, answered her prayers. And Augustine finally understood why Faith meant so much to his mother. Eventually, Augustine experienced an intellectual conversion and a change of heart. With St. Monica’s inspiration, Augustine became one of the greatest intellectual and theologically inclined saints in the Catholic Church’s history.
Monica is a great example for many families who may feel frustration and even despair that their children may not be practicing their Faith as the parents taught them and want for them. Parents write to me all the time, or stop me at a conference and ask, “what do I do? My children aren’t practicing their faith anymore?” Unfortunately, in these brief emails or meetings, I can’t answer all of the various situations that are posed to me. However, I can suggest a few different ways that parents can preserve and encourage their family’s faith.
First, start young! Children are naturally more receptive to faith when they are raised in it. Teaching the basics in prayer means developing a prayerful foundation. This young set of parents from Nashville is teaching their daughter Mimi to pray Grace Before Meals! Isn’t she like a little “poster child” for Grace Before Meals! They are only doing what they themselves learned from their parents!
Yet, teaching them from the start isn’t a “guarantee” your children will be saints. Therefore, if you did raise your children in faith, but they are no longer practicing or starting to question their faith, make sure you remain open to their questions and try to seek answers to their questions or issues of doubt TOGETHER! Don’t just dismiss them in your frustration. Instead, try to seek the response to their concerns. Keep open the lines of communication and try to grow more confident in your own faith by trusting that God still loves your child more than you can imagine.
Another consideration is to make sure that you as parents are practicing what you preaching. While in Japan, I met several families who are trying to live their faith openly by taking time to pray together as members of an international group called “Couples for Christ.” While in Japan, I had a chance to do a Grace Before Meals Presentation for them.
The formula for this gathering is simple. While the parents come together, share a meal, take time for sharing, offering each other support, singing a few songs and offering some petition prayers. The children join in the prayers for a while but also have some time to play with the other kids. The children see that mom and dad DO pray together and with others – and not just in church. The kids see that mom and dad ARE serious about their faith.
The statement, “I believe faith is a ‘private’ thing” is unfortunately a temptation of the devil. We are tempted to not live our faith outside our home or church. The fact is, if you really have faith, you will not be afraid to share it everywhere! I realize that people are convinced that separation of church and state means that no one should talk about faith outside of church. But the fact is, God’s kingdom is not limited to church walls or my bedroom door! Make sure your children see that you are practicing your faith, and trying to practice what Christ preaches.
Here’s another little tip to help: make sure there is a balance between praying and playing! It would be nice if children and teenagers were naturally inclined to prayer. Although I do know some children who are, it is more likely they are more interested in playing outside or video games. The reality is, we can’t and should not force kids to say “formal prayers” all the time. That would be imbalanced. Remember, families are families. They aren’t mini-monasteries, or mini-convents, or mini-seminaries. Therefore, make sure you and your family has a healthy and balanced “diet” of activities: playing, praying, eating, relaxing, learning, talking, etc., etc.,
If you’re whole life exists around a particular sport or hobby, to the exclusion of other wholesome and inspiring activities, then you may need to take a break from it. Especially if it’s slowly creeping out time for prayer, excluding family meals, and just ‘chilling out’ as a family! The balance of a healthy life requires us to make sure we master our schedules instead of having our schedules master us!
Another suggestion would be for the families to encourage their children to make sure they have good friends. Make sure parents ask their kids questions about what makes a good friend for you? How can your children be good friends for others? Ask, “how do you know if a friend is helping or hurting you?” Children should know how to make these important interpersonal relational distinctions.
When I was in Toronto a few weeks ago, I met several young people as part of the BLD Youth Conference. In the Tagalog Language, BLD stands for “Bukas Loob Sa Diyos” – which translates to “Open Your Heart to the Lord.”
(Make sure you check out the updated picture page on the web to see other fun pics from these and other events!)
It was inspiring to see so many families in Canada and parts of the USA who are part of this growing International Group. Like the Couples for Christ, this group also started in the Philippines, where family ties are strong – but not without the challenges faced by the families in the west. But, these groups, and so many other ecclesial movements provide resources and relationships that can truly help your family grow stronger in communion with each other and God! If you have questions about your family’s faith, do something about it and join a good group of people who, like St. Monica, want their children to be saints too!
To summarize, I know that St. Monica provides for us a living example of what is necessary to preserve your family. Are you “waiting” for your children to grow up before making a decision to raise them in faith? If you are, you are denying them grace now! Are you telling your children to pray, but at the same time not praying yourself, or not letting your own children see you pray? If so, then your children are receiving mixed messages from you! Is there is a balance in your family, or do you just try to “squeeze in” prayers and church? If there is an imbalance, trust that the devil will always push and pull us off the path that requires us to be balanced if we want to ‘walk the talk.’ Finally, are you helping your children to “flock together” with other good kids? Trust me, they ARE out there! Are we helping them to understand healthy distinctions in relationships by making sure we have good relationships ourselves – starting with your spouse?
Ultimately, your children will make their own decisions. You can’t force them to be a saint right here and now! Just ask St. Monica who witnessed her son, Augustine, take baby steps in Faith only when she was ready to die! We have to trust that God is hearing your prayers. This week’s email blast is just one more way that God is trying to remind families of what is most important. This advice didn’t come from me, Fr. Leo. It really came from the witness of the saints, especially Monica, who I humbly ask to pray for all families and all children who do not yet know Your love and call to be saints, now and forever! St. Monica, pray for us!
Cid’s “dribble” of vinaigrette!
The Couples for Christ dinner in Japan, where I shared a Grace Before Meals presentation, gave me an opportunity to share (on an international level), the powerful message of our movement. At the same time, it gave me a chance to share a recipe for tasty vinaigrette that people can make with their children. By allowing one of the participating children, Cid, to help make the salad dressing, he not only learned a skill he can share, he also learned how eating veggies (like salad) taste so good!
When I “tested” him to remember the ingredients of the vinaigrette, he passed with flying colors. Then he proceeded to reiterate a very important point: Don’t drown the lettuce in salad dressing, but instead, simply lightly “dribble” (i.e., drizzle) the dressing over the salad greens! What a great kid, from a great family!
I use this vinaigrette, mixing and matching various ingredients and common sweeteners to inspire diversity in vegetable flavors as well as to wake up the taste of meats. For example, grilling steaks or meat and putting it on top of the fresh and lightly dressed greens inspires a bold taste without being an overly heavy meal! I made a similar meal while me and my friends were on vacation. We wanted a meal with bold flavors, but nothing too heavy that would hinder us from taking advantage of outdoor hiking and biking. Give it a try for your family.
Click here for the recipe.
Prayer for Families
Parents have a great responsibility AND privilege to raise their children in faith. Don’t worry, you are not alone. And, above all, God knows that you are trying to do your best. And, if you’re not doing your best, then God can also give you the courage and strength to do your job better. Go ahead and talk with the one who helped St. Monica get through her difficult years with her son, who eventually became a great saint!
Let us pray: Father in Heaven, we can be so imperfect at times. We can forget the blessings and we so often focus on the bad. In a time when families struggle to stay together, help us to remember that a family that prays together stays together. And Lord, even when some of our family members turn away from You, help us to trust that you will never turn your back on them. Give us grace to strengthen our ties with one another and with You. Give us grace to seek the support and communities to keep our family focused on Your love, Your laws, and Your invitation to be part of Your heavenly family forever. Amen.
Ask Fr. Leo for fatherly advice.Any submissions may be used in future Grace Before Meals publications.
Please forward Fr. Leo’s weekly email blast to anyone you think would benefit. If you haven’tsigned up for the Food for the Body, Food for the Soul weekly email blast, go here to register now. Also visit our blog.
Forward email
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